By choice or by chance -- you have found yourself dating a man who is grieving the loss of his wife. What do you need to know as the partner of a widower?. How to Date a Widowed Man. By: Candice Coleman. Falling in love after the loss of a spouse can be tricky for both the widower and his dates, who may have. May 5, Dating a man who is grieving the loss of his wife or who has not moved past his late wife is no easy task.
Widowers often need the social support of those around them, so practicing your words is essential.
Encouraging a widower to "Move on with your life" or "Stop moping around" may seem helpful, but such phrases can inspire guilt or stall a widower's grief process. Instead, offering words of kindness, such as "Your wife sounds like she was a wonderful woman.
How to Date a Widowed Man
Building a New Relationship Your partner may fall into the habits he shared with his wife and encourage you to participate. He want to visit the same spots they visited or spend the weekends at his former in-laws' cabin. Gently suggesting new places to vacation, or taking on a new hobby together -- such as taking a ballroom dancing class or volunteering with a local charity -- can help the two of you bond and focus on the present, according to the Center for Behavioral Health in its website article "Things to Consider When You Marry a Widow or Widower.
If you find that you are repeatedly ignored or insulted by his family, talk to your boyfriend in private about the effect this behavior has on you. He may be able to remind them that although they are grieving, their actions are hurting someone who has nothing to do with his late wife's death.
Pacing the Relationship It is natural for widowers to feel guilty when first approaching dating, and they may need to adjust the pace of your relationship. Remember that this is not a personal slight -- but a step that can ensure both of you are emotionally healthy enough to push things forward when the time is right.
The success of your relationship will depend largely on the emotional stability of the man you are dating -- and whether he is truly ready to move on.
What do you need to know as the partner of a widower? Take things slow, have personal boundaries, realize that grief is an individual process, and prepare for the cold shoulder from friends and family. Relationships with widowers can be tempestuous, but if he is truly ready for a new relationship, you may find that the widower can be the partner that you need -- and more. Taking it Slow Take things slow with a widower.
10 dating tips for widows and widowers
Keogh recommends taking things slow with a widower, especially during the first few months of a relationship. Even if your guy tells you that he is in love and ready to start a new life, he may not be ready to move on.
- 10 dating tips for widows and widowers
Watch to see if his actions match his words. Letting Him Lead Try not to give too much of yourself. Resist the urge, says Keogh, and let the man take the initiative to contact you and arrange dates.
How to Date a Widowed Man | Dating Tips
If he is truly interested in a long-term commitment, he will make an effort to be with you. If on the other hand, he is just looking for a warm body -- it will soon become too much work for him to keep up the romantic aspect of the relationship.
Try not to give too much of yourself, as tempting as it can be when dating a grieving widower.